*Keeping your glass filled and spirits high one Thursday at a time! We introduce The Squeaky Curd readers to Welcome to Thursdays, a local social group determined to make your Thursdays more fun. Each Wednesday we feature a fictitious history or dazzling explanation of a Milwaukee County bar that we gather at on Thursday evening – join us weekly!*
Greetings and Salutations my most honorable Thursdians,
I urge you all to make haste and join me this Thursday at The Wicked Hop (345 N Broadway); you see these past few weeks we have been tricked! Had I known the consequences I would have tread carefully… but I was foolishly bewitched.
It all happened the night we traveled to the Black Rose Irish Pub. I took a rather slow Uber to meet my fellow Thursdians, and all was going accordingly until we took a wrong turn. At first, I thought that the driver knew a quicker route, so I kept quiet. But I soon noticed that something wasn’t right with the driver: he kept checking his watch as if he were running late. Things were looking fishy, so I told the driver we were going the wrong way – he said nothing and kept driving. Nervous and sweating, I now demanded that he stop the vehicle, and as if there were a wall in front of our car, we stopped on a dime. The driver pointed out the window to an alley way darker than a Guinness at midnight. At this point I knew I had to make a run, so I jolted toward the other door and was greeted by two larger than life Clydesdales pulling some sort of evil carriage. The driver at the helm had no face, but two eyes filled with an evil red hue glared down at me. He again pointed down the alley way. It was clear now that I had no choice but to go down the ally.
I slowly opened the door, and cautiously entered the alley; with each step I could feel the very cheer in my soul diminishing. As I ventured on, a fowl stench overtook me, and I found myself at the edge of an oddly placed swamp. Within the water I saw three toads, I wasn’t able to make out what they were sitting on, but they were all staring directly up at me. They spoke – but oddly enough, they would each take turns saying the words to form the sentence. They asked me if I was one of the founders that spread the word of Old Milwaukee Beer. I obviously replied with a proud and honorable, “you betcha!” The toads then started turning the object they were sitting on to reveal a disgusting Budweiser bottle. They turned it more and more until the bottle cap flew off and the contents flew into my face. They shouted the words: “the elixir of Cutler’s doing now controls your actions.”
Since this moment I have been hypnotized. I was only awoken through the help and aid of the amazing staff at The Wicked Hop. With their delicious beer and amazing food, I was able to beat Cutler and his evil magic frogs. But I was failing you all as a humble servant to the great elixir we call Old Milwaukee. Because of the hypnosis, I wasn’t able to tell the great tales of our golden brew; but I can assure you that I’m now back to my usual self. This Thursday I call upon all to join me in the battle for good against the evil will of Cutler’s Budweiser.
Cheers my Friends!
Your humble servant to Old Milwaukee,